Alejandro

At this point in my life. I can say truly that I am very happy. I just turned 21 years old this past Tuesday and there isn't a change in what I can do other than use my own ID to go to clubs and bars but the best part is that I enjoyed and celebrated my birthday with my siblings or in my words.. 'my Parent's other kids.' :) haha. My great friends were there as well, I loved it. By far, the best birthday I've ever had, and I would like to Thank you those who made it possible. Thank you :).

I am now employed. My very first 'Retail' gig :) haha. It just so happens to be at the coolest shop alive ! It's practically OFF THE WALL, yes I work at Vans :) haha. I am very new to retail but its been so far very decent, the people there are very cool, mad awesome, and helpful. Really appreciate their sincerity.

I'm still a high school drop-out and a college NMI ! (College-Never Made It) lol. But hopefully in September I can go back to the program I was in, well at least I hope that Mr. Spratt guy wasn't bullshitting me D: .

I've met the pretty, the ugly, the spectacular, the weirdos, the cocky, the bitch, the whores, the wannabe players, and most definitely met the greatest within the past 20 years of my life :) Most of them are still my friends LOL :) and the rest.. well they're history.

My boyfriend, well my girlfriend; and so I say. He's been wonderful. I mean, we don't peedeeaye but its cool. I totally respect that. I can see him gradually becoming more and more of a boyfriend that he is, haha if that makes any sense. We're like totally just a like yet total opposites. I want him to know that I appreciate him, appreciate who he is, what he does, and the things he say. I do. Even though I tell him I don't like it when he looks at me.. change, talk, eat, or just laying there etc. I honestly love the way he looks at me even though it makes me feel weird LOL because my self esteem isn't all great lol.

Kamerin, Kamerin Kamerin. My 3 year old son. He's the greatest :). My night & day. People have so much to say about my way of being a Mother. Yes I am a total bad one, but I never said I was a great mother. I never expected the recognition of being one. At least I'm not abandoning my son when he needs me and I miss him. I love my baby, he's the man of my life. The one I would never turn against. I love him, he's the one man that I know will love me truly and honestly without a doubt, without judging me, without getting jealous, without a care about what I say, do or look like. Because I am his Mother.

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Lose Yourself.

Hi,.

I'm at the point in the day where I'm about to just snap out. Maybe its postpartum depression of turning twenty one and finally being officially legalized. But I doubt it, highly doubt it at that. I am so not happy anymore. Everything but my jobs are making me happy. I honestly am not happy with what I'm doing. I'm not lazy, trust me on that. I just feel like I'm about to have a melt down. I'm not happy. I'm not happy at all. It makes me so frustrated to know that I am driving myself crazy.. with all these decisions to make and I'm so lost in the sauce right now. Oh my gosh... I can cry a whole river for myself but I refuse to girl about this. Why cry? I can get through anything. This shouldn't stop me from being happy but it is.. it really is.

That's all I got to say right now.

But I will add that I want a career, not just a job.

Who Wants A Billion Dollars?

.. It's a 'wow' night.

I live.

[I could really use a wish right now.
Although I know wishes don't come true.
It just happens.]

I got myself a job. It's been twenty days or so since I quit and now I'm on the move again. I can say that I am very proud of myself. But with the whole school thing, I'm slacking. I'm not happy..; maybe I spoke too soon before. *sigh. I don't know what to do. I think this coming Monday, I will definitely go up to the school I'm supposed to be attending everyday from twelve thirty in the afternoon until four thirty in the evening. But since the first day that I was there, I never came back. Did I mention that I'm a failure at life? Story of my life..

[Paramore - Use Somebody (cover)]

I am phoneless now. I've been phoneless for a minute now, almost a month. ALMOST. I kind of sort of like it that way though. I like to roam the city without anyone bothering me. Even though sometimes it's always good to have someone to talk to while you're just shopping or to receive a text from a friend but I'd rather be alone sometimes. I sound all extra emo but I'm not. I just like to have time to myself sometimes. The city is my favorite place. It's where my heart lies. I love Philadelphia even with it's craziness.. wait, that's why I love it so much.


P.s. I just signed up for a plan with At&t. $59.99 a month, I think. Hm.. interesting. I gotta call to confirm my order on Monday, lets see how it all works. Womp womp. Haha.

[Jason Mraz - Geek in the Pink.]

I've been dating this Mexicanlooking Cambodian for a while now. I totally completely adores him. I sincerely can say that I can fall hard, but I won't. I know he hearts me completely. Well he better, at least lol!... We're the funniest people together. I crack myself up with him. We joke, we laugh, we eat, we sleep. We sex, we watch shows, and movies, we're blunt.. What more can I say? We're like the Perfect Two :).

... Theres this kid on Facebook and he's telling me that he wants to marry me. Oh my gosh..

Feels like I'm wearing a size Ten.

Theres way too much going on in my life right. A death that shouldn't have affected me as much as it has. Goodnight Joey :) Heads held high always. I'll always remember you. - I'm enrolled into a school/program that is making me do more work than I should have to to get my Diploma. My job interview is constantly being rescheduled due to lack of sturdy ideas of what I'm going to do. With school in the way and everything else just pulls me down under. I feel so under stress but I refuse to be stressed out. I simply refuse it.

My Daddy's birthday was Yesterday. Happy Birthday Daddy, I love you. You're still my #1:). Always.

I'm just on my pursuit of happiness.

I think I'm going to lay off school for now and just work until September comes, what the hell. It's driving me insane.. TOTALLY insane. Ugh.